I keep up with news at home through the local paper online. Over Thanksgiving, a story broke about two young men that were found dead in an apartment, no sign of trauma. I told Kevin right after I read it that I guessed drugs were the culprit. One of the men was a soldier home on leave from the Iraqi War.
Yesterday, they reported that a heroin overdose killed the man in the Army. It made me so mad, for several reasons. Firstly, this man was buried shortly after his death, with full military honors. I realized they can't exactly hold off to wait for toxicology reports to come back, but he deserved no such honor in my opinion. He may have been a great soldier, and yes, he served in Iraq, but when you make such a selfish, stupid choice to do such a horrific drug- especially while under contract by the U.S. Military- well, no honor should come to you. Soldiers take an oath, to serve this country honorably, in uniform and out. You are held to a higher standard. You are more accountable for your actions. You represent this country. Not to mention you stand the chance of wrecking your whole future if you get caught, a dishonorable discharge will follow you around the rest of your life. It isn't like getting fired from a job, it's more like having a criminal record.
This man had a family. He had a child. Why?? It was only a matter of time before that article got a comment wondering if things he had experienced in Iraq had pushed him to use drugs to "forget". Ok- well I can understand experiencing the unimaginable during war. I still cannot understand why choose to use drugs.
If there is one thing that I have learned while being married into the military, is that help is around every corner. They provide more resources for any kind of help than any civilian job or insurance coverage I have ever heard of. And not only is it free of charge to the soldier, they remind you constantly that it is there. I am sure even moreso when you are in a combat zone. I, as a military wife, have gotten help in a heartbeat. (not for drugs! lol- for other things) I know, as only a spouse, how much help is out there. That is how much they let you know. In Okinawa, where we only had AFN channels to watch on TV, there were no commercials, so they ran historical facts and local facts and information on military services in turn. Many of those commercials revolved around resources for help whether it be gambling, abuse, substance abuse, emotional help... so on.
It disgusts me that someone who should have been representing our country honorably, died doing such a selfish thing. And his family, his child have been left to pay the price.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Things that are "normal" to me
Being married to the military is exciting, terrifying, exhausting and stressful. It is also quite a privilege. My Dad was completely right. Only certain people are cut out for it. I was thinking the other night, about things in my life that are "normal" that in the civilian world are not. Here are a few of them...
-I have fallen asleep many a night to the sound of artillery booming in the distance
-I have passed convoys of humvees while on my way to the grocery store
-I move every 3 years or so
-I need to show ID to get to my home
-When my husband goes on "business trips" he can be gone for months
-On these "business trips", I have heard live gunfire while on the phone with him
-My husband can't always come home and tell me what happened at work
-My husband gets up some mornings and practices hand to hand combat
-I see and hear military aircrafts flying overhead quite often
-Near my house, there is a motor pool and barracks
-in your neighborhood, are there street signs that say "Stryker Dismount Point"??
It is an interesting life, that is for sure.
-I have fallen asleep many a night to the sound of artillery booming in the distance
-I have passed convoys of humvees while on my way to the grocery store
-I move every 3 years or so
-I need to show ID to get to my home
-When my husband goes on "business trips" he can be gone for months
-On these "business trips", I have heard live gunfire while on the phone with him
-My husband can't always come home and tell me what happened at work
-My husband gets up some mornings and practices hand to hand combat
-I see and hear military aircrafts flying overhead quite often
-Near my house, there is a motor pool and barracks
-in your neighborhood, are there street signs that say "Stryker Dismount Point"??
It is an interesting life, that is for sure.
Friday, December 14, 2007
How the heck...
My kitchen is a mess. It looks like the dirty dish tornado ripped through here. How does this happen, exactly, when it is just me and two very small other people in this house right now?? I am not cooking full meals, so the dishes should be minimal. I usually give Kaya breakfast and lunch on paper plate as well so I am just not understanding what is going on in here. Thank goodness for dishwashers though, without it, I would be screaming and asking to be committed.
On a happier kitchen note, our new microwave arrived today. Behold the beauty and power of the newest member to our Cuisinart stainless steel small kitchen electric family. And finally, we have a microwave with an actual microwave plate in it. Not our sad version of a dinner plate on the rotating wheel. I can finally make popcorn again without starting a fire!!
Let's just hope a coyote doesn't pee on this one. (This is a true statement and if you don't know the story just ask)
On a happier kitchen note, our new microwave arrived today. Behold the beauty and power of the newest member to our Cuisinart stainless steel small kitchen electric family. And finally, we have a microwave with an actual microwave plate in it. Not our sad version of a dinner plate on the rotating wheel. I can finally make popcorn again without starting a fire!!
Let's just hope a coyote doesn't pee on this one. (This is a true statement and if you don't know the story just ask)
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Happy Birthday Hali-Bear!!
My little Hali-bear is one!!! I cannot believe how time flew. This has been one rollercoaster of a year, and I am so glad it is about two weeks away from being done. But today I celebrate my little munchkin's birthday. I am so lucky to have two beautiful little girls, healthy and happy. I cherish each and every second I get with them, even if sometimes they make me want to pull my hair out.
Love you babies :) And Happy birthday Hal-bear!
Love you babies :) And Happy birthday Hal-bear!
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Maybe there is something to be said for religion and faith....
It's been a while, I know. Since then- of course a lot has happened personally. Hali is full on walking, it didn't take long after those first two shaky steps. Kevin fought, and lost a battle to postpone going to BNCOC again. So he is in Georgia now, enjoying the warm weather and hating the chow hall food, and also cramming all the schoolwork he put off here. I put my two weeks notice in at Macy's, then took it back. I wasn't sure if my schedule there would work with my schedule of Kevin not being here, but I worked something out with my manager. But the largest event, the most sad and unbelievable is this.
A childhood friend of mine lost her brother in a Black Hawk crash in Northern Italy. He was a Captain in the Army, a company commander, a pilot, a newlywed, a brother, a firstborn son, a good Christian in all sense of the word, a friend... this sentence could go on and on. There are many reasons I think this loss has hit me so hard, even though my memories of Christian only extend in my childhood as "Maja's quiet older brother". Maja and I met when we were three years old when we both started taking violin lessons through the same teacher. We continued to go to all the same elementary, middle and high schools. I went to her birthday parties, I saw her on weekends at group lessons, in school - if we had a class together, more likely than not, we sat next to or near each other, owing to the fact that her last name and mine both started with "Sko". When I think back on my childhood, the Skoglunds were a very steady pillar in my memories. I recall one elementary school trip where we went to one of the museums in Chicago. On the way back home, the bus got stuck in traffic and we were considerably late getting back. I remember it being dark when we arrived at the school and all the parents were already there waiting. Mrs. Skoglund was one of the chaperone's, and her and Maja and I were all sitting in a seat on the way back. Both Maja and I passed out on her lap. I remember waking up with her comforting arm on me and wondering why we were still on the bus.
Now I wish I could give comforting arms to Maja and her Mom.
This event has made me think so much on the part religion and faith and beliefs play in our lives. Maja and her family have a strong Christian faith. The truly believe what they are taught from the Bible, and they live by that. When I was younger, I didn't understand that, and truthfully- I still don't. I was not raised in religious household, I didn't go to church. That said, it doesn't mean I don't have morals or my own faith and beliefs. But I look upon their family, and see such strength and success and I don't doubt for a second that their upbringing played a huge part in that. Through such a huge loss, the outpouring of love for this family has been tremendous. Their strength in such a trying time is admirable. Many families would and have crumbled and self-destructed under such duress. I know their faith and their love for their God and Jesus (yes.... I said it!!) is taking them through this. And I say it and I believe it.
Although I did not know Christian in adulthood, reading through Maja's blog and Christian's wife's blog shows me exactly who he was. He was the kind of person most people only wish they could be. In 31 years he lived more life than most people do in 80. He embraced life, in all regards. He excelled at sports, at school, in the military. He was a risk taker, a pilot, a biker. He was an exceptional human being. We should all be so lucky if we live lives half as full as his. But yet, it was much too short. Christian should have died old, peaceful. With his family, his children, his children's children at his side. With a life lived in full on his terms. But someone had bigger plans, and I know that. I don't say that to try and comfort myself when I don't understand why things happen. I know this from past experience. I truly believe that God has a bigger plan, and there are things we just won't know about until it's our time to know.
I know I don't speak like this often and it probably come as a surprise to some of you that I have this side to me. Yes, yes... I too pray, sometimes. I believe in God. I question things written in the Bible, yes. I have not always lived my life in an honorable manner, but I don't think that has anything to do with my lack of religious guidance, but rather because of my strong will to do things MY way on MY terms.. and yes, sometimes not thinking things through. But, all in all, everything in my life so far has been a learning experience and I have learned from them. And I may be far from perfect but I'm learning and I'm trying. And I feel like I am succeeding in the most important task I've ever tried to tackle: parenthood. My children are definitely a gift from God and I don't take that for granted in the least.
As I ramble, the point I am meaning to get to is this.
There is something to be said for the man Christian became and now, will eternally be remembered as.
Two things reflect directly upon that: His faith and his parents.
So, if this is any testament to a religious and faithful upbringing- then I am much more open minded to it. It's not so scary.
And to the Skoglunds, I mourn with you. I cry with you- more often than you know. Here on Earth, we are left with the heartache. But I truly believe that Christian is the person he is because of you- his family, and because of his beliefs in God and Jesus. And I truly believe that prayers and love will get you through this. So that is what I send to you, every day.
A childhood friend of mine lost her brother in a Black Hawk crash in Northern Italy. He was a Captain in the Army, a company commander, a pilot, a newlywed, a brother, a firstborn son, a good Christian in all sense of the word, a friend... this sentence could go on and on. There are many reasons I think this loss has hit me so hard, even though my memories of Christian only extend in my childhood as "Maja's quiet older brother". Maja and I met when we were three years old when we both started taking violin lessons through the same teacher. We continued to go to all the same elementary, middle and high schools. I went to her birthday parties, I saw her on weekends at group lessons, in school - if we had a class together, more likely than not, we sat next to or near each other, owing to the fact that her last name and mine both started with "Sko". When I think back on my childhood, the Skoglunds were a very steady pillar in my memories. I recall one elementary school trip where we went to one of the museums in Chicago. On the way back home, the bus got stuck in traffic and we were considerably late getting back. I remember it being dark when we arrived at the school and all the parents were already there waiting. Mrs. Skoglund was one of the chaperone's, and her and Maja and I were all sitting in a seat on the way back. Both Maja and I passed out on her lap. I remember waking up with her comforting arm on me and wondering why we were still on the bus.
Now I wish I could give comforting arms to Maja and her Mom.
This event has made me think so much on the part religion and faith and beliefs play in our lives. Maja and her family have a strong Christian faith. The truly believe what they are taught from the Bible, and they live by that. When I was younger, I didn't understand that, and truthfully- I still don't. I was not raised in religious household, I didn't go to church. That said, it doesn't mean I don't have morals or my own faith and beliefs. But I look upon their family, and see such strength and success and I don't doubt for a second that their upbringing played a huge part in that. Through such a huge loss, the outpouring of love for this family has been tremendous. Their strength in such a trying time is admirable. Many families would and have crumbled and self-destructed under such duress. I know their faith and their love for their God and Jesus (yes.... I said it!!) is taking them through this. And I say it and I believe it.
Although I did not know Christian in adulthood, reading through Maja's blog and Christian's wife's blog shows me exactly who he was. He was the kind of person most people only wish they could be. In 31 years he lived more life than most people do in 80. He embraced life, in all regards. He excelled at sports, at school, in the military. He was a risk taker, a pilot, a biker. He was an exceptional human being. We should all be so lucky if we live lives half as full as his. But yet, it was much too short. Christian should have died old, peaceful. With his family, his children, his children's children at his side. With a life lived in full on his terms. But someone had bigger plans, and I know that. I don't say that to try and comfort myself when I don't understand why things happen. I know this from past experience. I truly believe that God has a bigger plan, and there are things we just won't know about until it's our time to know.
I know I don't speak like this often and it probably come as a surprise to some of you that I have this side to me. Yes, yes... I too pray, sometimes. I believe in God. I question things written in the Bible, yes. I have not always lived my life in an honorable manner, but I don't think that has anything to do with my lack of religious guidance, but rather because of my strong will to do things MY way on MY terms.. and yes, sometimes not thinking things through. But, all in all, everything in my life so far has been a learning experience and I have learned from them. And I may be far from perfect but I'm learning and I'm trying. And I feel like I am succeeding in the most important task I've ever tried to tackle: parenthood. My children are definitely a gift from God and I don't take that for granted in the least.
As I ramble, the point I am meaning to get to is this.
There is something to be said for the man Christian became and now, will eternally be remembered as.
Two things reflect directly upon that: His faith and his parents.
So, if this is any testament to a religious and faithful upbringing- then I am much more open minded to it. It's not so scary.
And to the Skoglunds, I mourn with you. I cry with you- more often than you know. Here on Earth, we are left with the heartache. But I truly believe that Christian is the person he is because of you- his family, and because of his beliefs in God and Jesus. And I truly believe that prayers and love will get you through this. So that is what I send to you, every day.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)